Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Long Song

An excerpt from Prince Charming's song in the car today, one in a lifelong series of car songs. The entire collection is only a small sample of the Prince Charming Comedy Network.
So, here it is......

My cousin has a chocolate mustache,
I bet it cost a lot of cash,
It looks pretty weird,
But not as weird as my beard,
Which is actually awesome,
Better than a possum,
Which are better than koala bears,
With all their crazy hairs.
Koala bears are cool,
Except for when they drool.
We'll never be apart,
Except for when they fart.

There was more, much more but I can't remember the rest. He also happened onto the one slang word he didn't know for his boy parts (rhymes with long, you can figure it out). My explanation of why he really didn't need to sing that particular word resulted in a very serious "Oh. Okay." Followed, of course, by the hysterical laughter I had been expecting.

Monday, December 29, 2008


I love Christmas. Well, any year but this year. I love the decorating, the shopping, the Advent candles and services, the preparations, the special goodies, the carols, the lights, the excitement and especially singing Silent Night in a candlelit church (which may be a Lutheran thing...hmmmm). This year, of course, was tough. Months ago, I realized that none of us could face Christmas here without Mama. I called my uncle, my mother's favorite brother, and invited ourselves to Texas. I am so, so glad we went.
We left town earlier than originally planned because I just could not stand a second more of being here without my Mama. The world felt completely skewed and I was uncomfortable in my own skin. So we made the long drive from a home that didn't feel at all like Christmas to my uncle's house, were Christmas was quietly waiting. My aunt and uncle had beautiful Christmas lights. They had Christmas music playing. They had a crackling fire, beautiful nativity sets, three trees, my grandfather sitting in an easy chair and tons of cookies. Most of these things were available here, and yet it didn't feel the same. Quaint or cliche as it may sound, there is much to be said for being sheltered in the arms of your family. It is so good to be loved. And it is love that makes all the difference.

Thursday, December 11, 2008


Last Saturday morning, Little Runner Girl's basketball team went up against one of the two most dreaded teams in our league. You may be wondering how tough an 8th grade girls basketball team can be. Well, here is a bit of trivia for you. Joe Kleine's daughter happens to be in 8th grade. As in used-to-play-for-the-Celtics, etc. Joe Kleine. And her Daddy just happens to be the coach. Needless to say, we lost and it was not pretty. I am proud to say that Little Runner Girl made 4 of our wonderful 6 points. Final score...24-6.
So what could be worse than playing against a team coached by a professional basketball player? The Dragons. These girls come from a small school in a not great part of town with a tiny run-down gym. These girls just slaughter us. These girls slaughter all the other teams in our league. I'm not sure what they feed these Dragons, but I wouldn't be surprised if it involved human sacrifice.
Final score...47-6.

Thursday, December 4, 2008

December 4th

My very , very first memory is of sitting on the textured taupe couch in our living room in Houston. My parents let me hold "my baby" in my lap. She grabbed my pinky with her tiny hand and grabbed my heart at the very same instant.
She was blonde haired, green eyed and the most ridiculously cute child on the planet. She was not the "Baby Bruvver" I ordered, but I am so glad I decided to keep her. I did ask my parents to take her back. Fortunately, babies come with a no return policy.
When we were little, I told her we bought her at K-Mart on a "blue light special" and if she was bad we would return her. I threw books into her playpen so she could "read". I taught her to write the letter K. When she wrote it on my table I begged our parents to not be angry. After all, she had written a real letter. It was an "accident" that she wrote it on the table. I taught her how to write her name in cursive, stick cheerios to the side of the bowl and climb trees. I learned to teach by experimenting on her.
She is a grown up banker now and a wife and a mommy, but she will always be my Baby Sister.
Happy Birthday BlondieCakes! I love you!

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Plugged Up!

I subbed for Yellow Rose's class this morning and forgot to plug in the Christmas tree lights in her room. About 2.6 seconds after he walked into the room, Big D came over eager to help and asked "Can I plug up the Christmas Tree?" I refrained from both laughing and making any of the
amusing replies that popped into my head. I just smiled and said "Go ahead, Honey".
It just occurred to me that I may be the only person to find this funny. Oh well.

Monday, December 1, 2008

The Playmobil Conspiracy!

This evening I discovered yet another reason I am happy I had my kids while I was still in my twenties. Playmobil!
In case you don't know, Playmobil is a European company that makes wonderfully detailed, tiny little toys. There are entire Playmobil worlds of itty bitty fun. Pirates. Knights. Fairytale castles. Hospitals. Police stations. It really is cool stuff.
Anyway, my kids just loved Playmobil when they were younger. Prince Charming still plays with it occasionally. The thing with Playmobil is that somebody (meaning parents) has to assemble some of these tiny little items. The sets come with illustrated instructions which avoids the whole strangely translated English issue. So what does all this have to do with the timing of my procreation? I was still in my twenties when I first put together a Playmobil set. This was a much easier task than it is at 40, let me just tell you!
And why am I still putting together eentsy bits of Playmobil plastic?
I still get the kids a Playmobil Advent calendar every year. Yes, they are probablty too old for it, but it's tradition! Besides, Prince Charming still openly enjoys his (and, in fact, has reminded me every day this week that it was almost December 1st). Little Runner Girl would probably tell you she's too big for toys, but she still opens hers and sprawls in the floor arranging the little figures. Of course, I did have to resort to asking her for help putting her brother's things together today. That stuff was way easier to see when I was in my twenties. It's a conspiracy, I swear!!!