Thursday, August 28, 2008

Club

One of the many amusing things about Little Runner Girl is her long list of food quirks. She eats multicolored foods (M&Ms, Skittles) by color, in the same order every time. She loves dried apricots, but only if they are cut into tiny pieces. She loves Swiss cheese, unless it is shredded. She will only eat perfectly smooth varieties of yogurt. She doesn't like any kind of condiment, including salad dressing, barbecue sauce and gravy. She likes almonds, but only if they are slivered. She prefers to eat her pasta and her sauce seperately. She used to take all the Crunches out of Crunch bars and eat them last until I cleaned up one too many slightly used Crunch pieces.
For dinner tonight she had one of her very favorite meals...a Sonic Chicken Toaster Club. With no cheese. No mayo. No tomato. And when she gets this lovely, dry, bread, bacon and chicken creation, she always opens it, takes off half of the lettuce, rearranges the bacon, and peals the crust from the bread. She eats the sandwich and then eats the crust. And then she sometimes eats the extra lettuce.
My girl cracks me up!

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Are you kidding me?!?

My last post reminded me of something that really irritated me yesterday. Let me preface this tale by saying that the mother of one of Prince Charming's classmates ( I call her Clownfish) irritates the you-know-what out of me. (And many of the other moms.) She wears ridiculously cutesy outfits that would look darling on somebody's Barbie. She talks exactly like a three year old girl, only with excessive dramatic pauses. She constantly has her extremely skinny lips pouted out in what she apparently thinks is a sexy look and reapplies lip gloss so frequently she must use a tube a day. She bears a startling resemblance to a drooling fish. A really tall drooling fish.
The cherry on top of this delightful package is her habit of flirting constantly with other people's husbands. Once, during a basketball game, she grabbed one of the Dads' so high on his thigh she could have peformed a prostate exam for him. The look on his face was priceless!
Obviously, I am not fond of this woman, but last night she just really pissed me off. As I stood talking to Little Runner Girl's algebra teacher, Clownfish sauntered over, said "Hi" and PATTED ME ON THE HEAD!!! WTF!!! Does she think I'm a puppy? I realize I am short, but Oh My Goodness Gracious! Does she really think it is normal to pat another adult on the head!?
On the other hand, she was wanting to talk to the math teacher, who just happens to be even shorter than I. Way to go impressing the teacher, moron!

Sprout

She came into the world measuring a whole 16 inches long. She didn't even make it onto the growth chart until sometime after her 3rd birthday. But now? Now my Little Runner Girl is officially an inch taller than her Mama. Of course, the fact that she is only 5'3" doesn't exactly suggest a future in the WNBA.
I don't care how tall she is, she will always be my little sugar baby.

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Heat

I swear to you it is twenty billion degrees outside! Really! I am not kidding!
Ok, maybe I am kidding a little bit, but only by about three degrees. I am one of those people who is almost always cold, but this heat is just insane. As my friend Suze is wont to say "You can only get so naked."
I used to know a woman who lived in a terribly cold climate. Summers were lovely, but she paid fpr them with endless months of winters beyond my comprehension. And somewhere in the midst of winter, every year, she reached her breaking point. A terrible deppression sets in and is only relieved by a change in the weather. It is the same for me, only with reversed seasons. I live in the Beautiful South and it truly is beautiful most of the year. But, at some point every summer, it gets so hot and humid that no words can begin to describe it. Normally pleasant and polite people become rabid dogs. Nobody goes outside, lest they swoon. The lovely plants on my porch have become heat parched skeletons. One goes from air-conditioned home to air-conditioned car to ridiculously warm swimming pool.
Bleh, heat! Please let me fast forward to October!